In this talk, Andrew Solomon elaborates on how the worst moments in our lives make us who we are. He starts off giving a few details about his childhood. The first thing he encountered as a child was when everyone at his school was invited to a young boys birthday party except him, and when his mother called to ask why, the mother simply said the young boy did not like Andrew. In 7th grade, mean kids on the bus called him Percy because of his demeanor and would chant it on every bus ride. He states that he graduated high school without ever going to lunch because he would have been laughed at for sitting with the girls and if he would have sat with the boys they would have laughed at him because he was meant to sit with the girls. Solomon states he survived his childhood with a mix of "avoidance and endurance." He says we need to take the traumas and make them part of who we are, and making a better self out of things that caused us hurt and pain. He claims that some of our struggles are things we're born with like our race, gender, sexuality and other things, but our other struggles are things that have happened to us. He proclaims the statement, "forge meaning, build identity!" It does not make what was wrong right, but what was wrong precious. In The Catcher in the Rye, Holden Caufield experiences many troubles himself. He doesn't have the best relationship with his parents, he gets bad grades and ends up getting kicked out of just about every school he attends. He also experiences the death of his little brother Allie, who died of Leukemia at a young age and uses this for one of his excuses to act out. Holden is not a dumb person he just doesn't try, and he looks at just about every person in the world as phony. Hearing the philosophies Andrew Solomon talked about, Holden did the opposite with his struggles and did not use them to better himself but instead let them consume him. It was noticeable that Holden struggled with signs of depression also, from things that he had gone through in his life. He didn't have many friends or people that he got along with because everyone was considered phony except his sister Pheobe and Jane Gallagher. Until this day, Andrew Solomon receives prejudice for being gay but he used this to build his identity. No matter what the circumstance, Holden could have used this to have a better outcome instead of living in his despair. We can't let the hurt and pain consume us, but we have to let it benefit us to bring us joy in the long run. Holden would need to use the struggles to establish his identity to pursue his dream of being the catcher in the rye. Forge meaning, build identity.
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